Instigating Your Divorce Online Might Not Be The Greatest Idea
It would be great if everyone agreed when divorce was on the cards. But, in my experience, this is rarely the case. Often, one spouse wants and is pushing for the divorce while the other desperately wants to protect the marriage. This was the case with me and my partner. So I know with certainty that this is a very difficult position to be in because you’re the odd one out, your heart is breaking, and you’re getting conflicting information.
Your heart is begging you to fight for your marriage while your head, some friends, and perhaps your attorney are all telling you to protect both your heart and your assets. This article will not give legal advice regarding your online divorce. But because I have conducted tons of research when trying to change my spouses mind about the divorce, my experience lies with saving marriages when you are the only one who cares, by taking control of what you can right now - you.
Want To Do To Save Your Marriage:
Here’s my top marriage saving tips that I have seen work countless times. I realize that they may seem counter intuitive and they may feel weird at first. But, you need to understand that doing what may make you feel better at this time (closing yourself off, engaging with your spouse, trying to make your spouse feel bad, trying to manipulate them, etc.) only pushes them further away and only speeds up the downward spiral you are on.
You Need To Be On Their Side:
Let’s think about this for a moment. You want a divorce, but they do not. You’re on opposite sides of the same fence. If he wins, you lose your marriage. If you win, you’ve managed to muscle him into to doing what he didn’t want to do. So, even in the best case scenario, his heart isn’t really in it and the chances for long-term success are not as good as they could be.
It’s better to jump on their side of the fence (or at least make them think that you are). Doing this can alleviate the tension and ensures that they begin to give you more access to them. You want to look like someone who doesn’t want a divorce, but who wants their spouse to be happy and who is happy to put your thoughts aside (at least for the time being) to help them accomplish this. I know this may sound scary, but it is actually the only plan that allows every one to get what they want, so that when the marriage is saved, you have the best chance of long term success.